Every day in our new place, puzzles present themselves:

-What is Italian for “I just spilled four liters of white paint on your stone sidewalk”?

-Do people here sometimes honk their horns to be friendly, or are they, in every case, insulting our driving?

-How do people cook all the slimy squid and creeping sea snails they buy from the seafood truck at the open-air market in our neighborhood?

Life here is an adventure. Spilled paint, honking horns and smelly sea critters are just the beginning.

On Sunday, Sept. 2, Jim and I performed the wedding ceremony of Mercy and Kenneth, a young Nigerian couple in the Verona International Baptist Church. They needed an English-speaking, ordained person to do the ceremony. So with the blessing of Victor, their lay-pastor, we did the honors. Marrying “in the church” was very important to the couple. To be allowed to do that, according to Nigerian custom, they had to stand before the church on three separate occasions to address any concerns from members about their proposed marriage. Then, the church gave its final approval. By marrying in the church, Kenneth and Mercy exposed many friends who are not Christians to the meaning of Christian marriage.

The Kelseys in Nigerian dress

The Kelsey family arrived on the big day in African clothes two women in the church made for us. An hour-and-a-half after the ceremony was scheduled to begin, Mercy and Kenneth arrived. (No one else had panicked in the interim, so we also tried to appear unconcerned.)

At the couple’s request, the ceremony followed “Nigerian Baptist tradition,” which, on paper, turned out to be just like “American Baptist tradition” right down to “thereto I pledge thee my troth.” The ceremony moved along as rehearsed until Jim presented the couple as husband and wife and the choir began to sing. Suddenly, the congregation joined in the singing and poured into the aisles and down to the front. Everyone was hugging and dancing and singing. Having worshiped with this church for several weeks, we were not altogether surprised. We looked at each other, shrugged our shoulders, laid down our papers and joined in the fun, laughing at our awkward attempts to clap and sway in time to the African rhythm of the music. Eventually, Hammed, the church secretary, took the microphone and explained that the service was not over yet. Everyone returned to their seats, and we took up our papers and finished the service.

Being given a place of honor at the head table during the reception presented more new situations:

-There was the ceremonial breaking of a pink nut-looking thing about the size of a softball. Then a plate of the pieces of the nut-looking thing was passed at the head table. The other people at the table took pieces and ate them, so we did, too. Wow, very bitter!

-The people sitting next to us were called down to dance with the bride and groom, and Jim and I sighed and nervously anticipated our turn. Somehow, the Master of Ceremonies never called us down. Whew!
Finally, when the pieces of wedding cake came by on a plate, we knew just what to do. Yum!

The bride and her maids of honor

Puzzles, figuring out cultural cues:

But, there was no puzzle as we watched Kenneth and Mercy express their love for each other on their special day. There was no mystery as to why their church family came around them and supported them so beautifully on their wedding day. The love this couple knows and this church knows is fueled by the love of God. This love is familiar to us. We have experienced its warmth as individuals, as a couple, as a family, and in fellowship with you in the US who partner with us in this ministry.

It was an honor to have a part in the marriage of Kenneth and Mercy. It was a celebration of their love, but also, a celebration of God’s love. We felt right at home, and we could see in the faces of our Nigerian friends that they did, too. What fun!

Please pray with us:

-For Kenneth and Mercy to continue to be witnesses to God’s love together, and for many years of joy for them as a couple.

-For Verona International Baptist Church as they desire to grow and to have a meeting place with access to public transportation and better visibility to the public.

-For Luke and Ben as they have begun in a new school again. Although the school is “English International,” 90 percent of the students are Italian, and Italian culture seems to permeate everything about the school. That is, of course, not a bad thing, but it can present puzzles.

-Quick Italian language acquisition for Jim and Debbie as we begin intensive Italian study in October.

Thank God with us:

-For the Italians who have helped us with various pieces of getting settled here.

-For a safe and comfortable home for our family.

-For our contact with fellow “internationals” like those in Verona whose courage on the journey spurs us on.

Your ABC missionaries in Italy,
Debbie, along with Jim, Luke, and Ben Kelsey

Responses can be sent directly to: jdkelsey@hotmail.com
Check out our website at: www.refugeinitaly.org

Remember, it’s World Mission Offering time! Your financial support keeps us and our colleagues around the world in the field. Participate in your church’s offering this fall, or, to contribute online, go to www.worldmissionoffering.org.